The Beauty of Being "Known"

My husband brought this rose home... I am enjoying the soft delicate pink color. I know that many people like the dark dark red roses.... and he has given me many of those over the years-not often, but now and then. I appreciated them, but something about those dark, almost black velvety roses grew tiresome for me. When asked, I expressed a preferance for pink roses... dark or light pink... or peachy pink.... or creamy pink two toned..... or yellow... or light red... or something other than dark red, but dark red was the main color I received... and they were beautiful and I enjoyed them.  Sometimes there would be a few roses... and a few pinks among the reds and sometimes just yellow or pink.

 Don't get me wrong.... I appreciated any of the roses he brought...and I told him so. This one is special though, because... he gave me something that I really like.... rather than what he wants me to like... or what he thinks I should like or what he knows is the color "they" say, is the love flower.

This gift went way beyond the flower... and the sweet baby's breath with it.... this one said that he knows ME... and gave a gift to me, for me. Precious.

 See.... the deep red roses are the flowers of "love"... so he was expressing his love to me and I am thankful.... but when he knows me and gives me a flower... in a color that HE wouldn't choose, but does because he knows I like it... well, that is special and I feel much more loved as a result. Silly, huh?  You know what else is funny? I enjoy those dark red roses so much more now, if they come... or any other color... or none at all... because he knows me more than he used to... and expresses that love sometimes. If I had all pink roses, I am sure I would get tired of them... I guess I enjoy variety also.

It takes time to get to know someone... and marriage is a good place to do that, but sometimes we shy away from being real... from expressing strongly what our desires are... and try to just please our mate. That isn't all bad... but it does make it harder for our mate to really know us.  At the same time, life isn't all about "me"... and it would never be right to expect a list of my likes to be consulted before any gifts are given... that would be silly. Marriage takes a lot of work... of negotiating.... of learning... of caring and adjusting... of loving... no matter what.

I have had to learn many things about my husband over the years... he does NOT like saurkraut.... gets nauseated from the smell. The kids and I like saurkraut... and it is so good for us. Early on in our marriage, I helped him to eat in a more healthy way... and he found he likes more than just the foods he thought he would like. There were a few though... saurkraut, sweet potatoes, and more... that he hated. Some he has adjusted to... others he tolerated.... he has recently said he loves sweet potatoes. :) I don't cook them with sugar and marshmallows, but rather just as baked sweet potatoes with butter and cinnamon... or sweet potato casserole with pineapple, butter, cinnamon, onions and apples....and he liked that, but it took years before he realized... he "loved" sweet potatoes. :)  Saurkraut will never fall into that category... and I stopped trying a long time ago. We have saurkraut for lunch when he is at work and when the smell will be totally gone before he gets home.

I did not want to have a budget early in our marriage... I resisted it.... and he insisted. I didn't like it... but finally grudgingly went along with the idea.   I finally gave it a chance... and found that a budget was so freeing. I had thought it would mean that I would be restricted even more than I already was... but found that knowing exactly how much I would receive for the time frame... was very freeing. I found that I liked knowing what the parameters were of what I needed to work with for groceries, household expenses, clothes, etc instead of him just giving me some money to use and having to ask him if there was enough for this or that.

We keep learning... and accepting.... and loving .... and growing. I am thankful for the beautiful pink rose... but even more than that, I am thankful that my husband showed he loves ME... in a sweet and special way.  God loves us even better than that... and His love is always perfect. Do we always see or recognize it? No, but we should... and we need to look for it... and we will find it if we look.

Shared on:

Counting Our Blessings
Modest Mom Monday
Soul Survival
Art of Homemaking Monday
Wednesday Prayer Girls
A Return To Loveliness
Mostly Homemade Monday